Archive for November, 2010
You showed me your journal and it really scared me. I don’t want to be in your head and definitely not in a relationship with you after the things I saw!
Nov 30, 2010 - No Comments
Your uni-brow looked like one of my first grader’s arts and crafts projects.
Nov 30, 2010 - No Comments
Your grand scheme for cheating the government ultimately imprisoned you and left me with ridiculous lawyer bills. You’re a genius.
Nov 30, 2010 - No Comments
You were unemployed and baked cookies all the time. I was hoping to not date my grandmother.
Nov 30, 2010 - No Comments
You had a fake ball and your excuse for cheating on me was that she was “intrigued to touch it and wanted to learn about it.”
Nov 30, 2010 - No Comments
You and your superstitions were two of the most stupid things I’ve ever encountered in my life. There’s salt all over our house from you throwing it over your shoulder.
Nov 30, 2010 - No Comments
We stopped having sex and I asked what was wrong. You then proceeded to tell me what the priest did. I was horrified.
Nov 29, 2010 - No Comments
You told me that you were competing in a mustache contest and would not be shaving for the next year. I told you I would leave. The mustache won.
Nov 29, 2010 - No Comments
You thought you were Hugh Hefner. You were a 28 year old man who wore a bath robe everywhere and yes, smoked a pipe. In reality, you were just a huge tool.
Nov 29, 2010 - No Comments
No matter how much you pleaded with me, I refused to acknowledge Country as a legitimate form of music.
Nov 28, 2010 - No Comments
Everytime you talked about politics, you embarrassed me AND yourself. How someone could spit back the O’Reilly factor so well was almost impressive.
Nov 28, 2010 - No Comments
